A quick guide on how to defrost ice
by Loner-kun
Summary: It is Yukino's birthday and so Hachiman decides on a peculiar present to get her. Fluff YukiXHachi


Updated the story since there were painful out of character moments in the original version so I changed it now.

* * *

A quick guide on how to defrost ice.

The contents of the container I held were a package meant for someone else. A present for most people was a way to materialistically affirm that they were still close. Such a concept was just plain shallow and when something unlikable comes, the shallow excuse is made. 'It's the thought that counts!' but really you didn't put much thought in if you didn't actually know the receiver of the present.

But as something that has become tradition to me for a few select people, it's best to forget the cards, the pleasantries and what the day symbolized. We shouldn't celebrate the persons birth but the fact that they're still around to receive everyone's gifts in the first place. It's no secret that everyone is going to die but making it to year fifty deserves some amount of praise among who you perceive to be friends.

This particular present though was a pain to order, mostly due to the "shipping" and "forms" needed to obtain it. Rest assured, the object was now in my possession so I were only now the deliverer for said present. Being this close to Christmas, a thick blanket of snow covered the ground which would soon melt and evaporate almost as if they never existed. No evidence would be there to argue for the existence of snow until the next winter.

It was also snow's birthday and by that.

Yukino Yukinoshita's birthday is tomorrow, which was in an hour or so. This would the first birthday present she would receive, it was ideal for her to get over the shock before Yui surprised her with whatever well thought-out presents she would decide for this year go-round.

Stepping into the station train, I was finally lucky enough to steal a seat. First come, first served! You could say it was survival of the fittest in the subway. You have to be conditioned to be faster, stronger and smarter in order to survive the long standing periods on the train. Some of the other passengers of the train would try to peek into the darkness of the container to satisfy one's curiosity. My present wasn't a strange choice but it was an otherworldly one.

Still being a college student, I was lucky to have a much more secure and stable financial backing but it was of no such part of mine. Though I do contribute quite a bit, it was mostly the income from her prestigious family that kept us off the dirt and in a nice, warm apartment with a working heater. Something most students like me would kill for, heh that'd be a winner. A battle royale for a heater...

That would be a proficient test to demonstrate the human race's ugly side in competing for selfish desires. You could argue it was survival instinct but it'll still demonstrate how the selfless would be pushed into the meat grinder for the selfish to prosper. Most call that natural selection.

Finally getting off the train, I hurriedly walked home hoping I could make it back before she returns from her family dinner.

I sure was lucky not having to deal with them but I can atleast be glad that whatever bad thing could happen, her birthday was right after so she can be reminded of what she has.

And what she will have after tonight.

Trudging through the endless snow which covered the empty street like a white blanket, I walked upstairs in the apartment building and tried to open the door which wouldn't budge to conventional strength. Setting the container to the ground, I rummage through my pockets to clutch onto freezing metal and brought my keys out. Inserting it through the keyhole, I twist which ushered a loud click as a alarm.

Task complete, I walk through, close the door and set the container down onto the far coffee table.

Fuaahh! This heat is bliss! My thick armour of gloves, t-shirt, sweater and scarf wasn't enough for the outside world. In here though, it was enough.

Taking off my scarf though left my neck susceptible to the cold air remaining in the room, like it was the fragrance of the previous denizen that left not too long ago.

Well, she was the Ice Queen for a reason.

Turning the thermostat, I set it to the optimal temperature so it was just enough to be warm by the time she got back.

Most would say the persons domain is representative of their personality and that would be true for some. The apartment was spotless, all the furniture all aligned neatly without being too claustrophobic. A large bookcase with an army of books lined up filled to the brim with classic literature (the pan-san stories however were hidden in our bedroom). In short, the place looked neat giving off an air of domestication.

With the preparations set, I sit down on the sofa beside the coffee table and wait. I figure the present could aswell. It wasn't an exaggeration to say she has seen it before but I doubt it remained in her thoughts for too long due to the events of today. Though the best presents worth giving were usually the ones you never realized you wanted.

Yeah, she's gonna be surprised all right.

I was pretty tired but my will to sit here and wait was more powerful then the most basic of urges, to sleep. It was the steadily building anticipation that kept me up, the emotional high sustaining me more then any coffee MAX would (though it certainly came close).

It wasn't until 1:19 AM that she returned home. The door unintentionally slammed against the wall beside it, a clear sign of the pent-up stress she exhibited from events to do with her family. I hear an odd silence after, of a non-moving intruder from the door.

Quickly, I undo the lever of the container and open the cage portion of the box allowing freedom to her present.

"Hachi? Are you inside?"

I only sit still, the dead silence was my answer. I imagine she saw my shoes at the door but took back by how dark the room was. Yukino rounded the corner leaving my conspicuous ass in plain sight.

She looked like a ghost, the cold air leaving her as pale as one anyway. The cold, harsh wind left it's mark and her clear breath was still visible even against the much warmer, cozier atmosphere of our living space. Her raven hair was blanketed in the darkness behind her.

"Hikigaya-kun, need I remind you tha-"

"Shhh."

Staring intensely at the container, Yukino eventually focuses her gaze unsure of what to make of it. Stupefied by what it is, her excellent brain power wasn't being put to use.

Through the darkness of the container, a paw cautiously came out as white as the snow outside into the light.

Then eventually, a second paw went ahead. As white as the other one, this little fur ball cautiously came out.

A loud clutter of bags being dropped caught my attention which was Yukino. Her face went completely red. Lifting her skinny, pale hands to cover her mouth as she breathlessly gasped.

Her breathing became more erratic, her cheeks glowing with a rosy-red hue and most shockingly, her eyes lightly clouded with tears.

"Oh Hachi-kun...T-t-t-th-thank you so much."

The cat I had gotten her eventually walked out, it's massive black eyes scanning the landscape it saw for any predators. It's big ears were coated in a wild mixture of ginger and black fur along with the rest of it's body. Every movement it made was slow and methodical, she ushered in curiosity given a cat's natural trait.

Yukino however eyed it passionately, her breath falling back into rhythm though she was only clutching her chest harder. Clutching the general area of her heart. A masculine sense of pride rose in my own knowing I caught her off guard so effectively!

"You, you, remembered."

She breathlessly whimpered it time and time again while being completely focused on the cat. My impeccable memory was too great an asset when used under the right circumstances! _Point 1 to Hikigaya._

As slow and methodical as the pet she admired, she approached the kitten in the same way as the kitten approached her. Yukino had her back hunch lower and lower to meet the cat's wide-eyed gaze where it's hetero-chromia was apparent. One pupil was an ocean blue while the other was an amber yellow not too different from gold.

The cat stretched it's neck enough to meet Yukino's nose. After sniffing a few times, she let out a loud "meow!" and decided to rub her face against Yukino as a sign of love which only earned a "awww" and a bodily embrace.

Yes, she saw this particular cat during our last visit to the pet-shop. She only gazed at it quietly before I regrettably had to drag her out of the place. Seeing as she had it now, she couldn't possibly complain! The best thing about this is how she'll top that for my birthday!  
There was a snowflakes chance in hell she'll be able to do better so I'm not holding out hope.

Still, if she did buy a truckful of MAX...

Even if she did, I don't think I'll be able to make such a elastic grin as she has on now forgoing her usual sensible code of conduct.  
At best, I'd probably look like the Cheshire chat, perhaps with rabies.

"Wow, I expected you to be happy but not to cry tears of joy."

Upon saying it, she finally notices and rushes to wipe her tears on her sleeve.

"T-thi-this? T-h-that w-was just a n-natural reaction to s-such a s-sur-surprise."

Her light stuttering words failed her and with that in mind, I'll remind her of a very obvious festivity as to why a cat has suddenly appeared in our domain.

"Happy Birthday Yukino."

Her lips quivered to say some sort of response but before she could, I put my arm around her to rest it on her shoulder whilst the cat would circle us (her) wrapping its tail around our (her) side(s).

_Tch fine, I'll ignore you too. We'll see how long that'll last when I lock your food away Kamakura 2.0._

"Yo-you shouldn't surprise m-me l-like that."

"Well, wasn't this outcome to be expected? Even if you never got a boyfriend, you were bound to be the old cat lady to someone in the future."

"Do-don't be so presumptuous, need I remind you who pathetically confessed?"

"Just looking out for your well-being. If you had a heart attack there then that would've been mission failed."

A cold body lead against me, trying to snuggle up for my warmth. Her black as night, silky hair rested limply down my chest and onto my cross legs.

"Hey, you're resting into me all of a sudden?"

"Most guys would kill for a beautiful lady like me to do that so s-stop complaining."

"Well that goes without saying..."

Roping my arm around her curvy shoulder, I feel the cold from outside being absorbed yet I also feel the warmth I have generated warm her bare skin. The cat, hanging around begged for attention.

"Meow."

"Hikigaya-kun?"

"Yes?"

"C-can we?"

Upon asking, she held a timid look in her eyes as if asking for permission. My permission? When has that ever mattered to her? Unsure of what that permission was for, I held my clueless stare.

"Can we what?"

"Can we take her to b-bed with us?"

"Why not?"

Leading them both to the bedroom, we undress and snuggle up against each other under the cold blankets. Our bodily warmth slowly spread across the bed as the newest member of the Hikigaya-clan jumped up on top and patted its paws on the sheets before curling up for sleep.

And with that, I pressfurther into the pillow mindful of Yukino's present fasincation with her new cat.

"We need a name for her."

Clenching the plain-blue bedsheets, she said it full with conviction.  
_We? I don't see that being used accurately at all now._  
_When the hell did I ever factor in the equation?_

As adorable as it is, the pillow feels more interesting. Anytime now and I'll lose myself.

"Well good luck with that, she's yours now."

Upon saying that however, a sudden pain hit me in my ribs.

"Inexcusable. A lady politely asks for your assistance and you ignore it? This is our cat now thus we need the perfect name for it. We'll take care of her together Hachiman."

She isn't asking now. She is demanding me.

Haaaah, man. Certainly the cat was adorable, I'm a cat person anyway! Wholeheartedly so it's only natural I take charge and name her myself!

"Kamakuro then."

Met with a irritant look courtesy of my well-thought assistance, I look away from the painful obscenity and insults she was no doubt thinking up.

"That's even worse then a half-hearted attempt. Try harder, there is no possible way I'll let either of us sleep with a kitty with no name."

Finger on lip, she continued her out of character rant. I-I know! I'll get us a dog for next year, what d'ya say Yukino. Regrettably, I didn't have the guts to say those words out loud hence I'll join her unfounded prejudice list.

"Ideally, we want a name sounding particularly Neko like. Maybe there's a chance it could have shaa or nyan in it's name? How about... Shaanyan?"

Want to make her name a cat pun?! That's now how these things work, saying she is terrible is an understatement. She may possess an unrealistic amount of specialties and abilities but coming up with names was not one of them.

"How about something else."

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I mean. Naming the cat that is a little... You know..."

"A little what?"

"Punny? It's a little senseless. Look at these things from a different perspective, don't you think such a errrr, special animal such as a feline is entitled to an actual name befitting their status?"

Pulling words out of my ass was my own specialty. As such, I held a dictionaries worth of ammo to make my point. Seeing Yukino's weakening gaze as she took what I said in consideration, she backed down looking dejected. Looking at the sleeping mass that lay above the sheets where our legs lay, she timidly reached out and started scratching the ear's rhythmically.

"I see your point. You try coming up with something better then but I don't hold much faith. Come up with a name starting...Now."

With the clock ticking, I browse through the data-banks of my mind. Let's see, Kamakura, Kamakuro, Blank.

My list was unexpectedly short. No matter. With my vast years of experience with the realms the otaku inhabited, I could remember many fictional cat names so plagiarism is something I can get away with!

Something with cats in...

There were many shows watched over the years but a easily forgotten one stood out from the masses. Hundreds of talking cats and a curse to transform a guy allergic to cats into a cat.

"Tama?"

"Isn't that a boy's name?"

"Suu?"

"No."

"Michi?"

"Certainly not."

"Komasa?"

"Not cute enough."

"It'll take forever at this rate."

My memory was dry for that particular show. Using Yukino as an example for an entire sex, girl's were insanely picky with names. I can't last much longer, this is going to take all night knowing her. For once, I'll try to be original and come up with a name knowing full well I won't meet Yukino's impossibly high standards.

"Milo."

"Good but not perfect yet."

"Amelia"

"Mhnnn, not good enough."

"Lulu then?"

"Go back."

"What, Amelia."

"No, go further back."

"Milo?"

"Milo. Milo."

Repeating those words, she pondered and whispered it familiarizing herself with it.

"... That is a good name."

With my eyes lowering back down to the furball, Yukino stretched out her free arm to gently caress the other large ear as the creature leaned into her touch.

"I'll treasure you forever Milo. Nya~?"

"Meow."

_Daawww, how cute._

With the rising body-heat we shared underneath these sheets, the heat our new pet greedily laid as close as she could to, I also felt a rising courage rise to ask on her view of my performance.

To know how well I did in understanding her needs and wants as obvious as they were.

"One of the best birthdays ever?"

And with a sincere grin on her face, she faced my direction and lovingly replied.

"The best."

My throat feeling spontaneously numb and my breath hot, I retreated back down further in the sheets again. Her reply to echo in my mind all night but I suppose I'll take solace in her joyous mood to account for it.

In order to defrost an ice queen, a quick easy way would be to give them a cat. This reaction would be instantaneous and also a guaranteed success.


End file.
